The Coolest Kids in Town: a blog about Baltimore, DC, and the misadventures of two-city life.

Our broken hearts go out to Kenya today.

Ladies. Gentlemen. Penguins of the Academy. I want to apologize to all of you. Coda and I have failed. We have. We’ve failed you. No, no, we have. We’ve failed you. Don’t interrupt! I said we’ve fucking failed you. Because we had forgotten, in our infinite wisdom, to introduce you to our newest round of Tex’s Truck Stop Drinks . Now I know what you’re thinking: No, we don’t want any more drinks! What do you mean, 'truck stop?’ Who are you guys? How did you get in my house? But those questions aren’t important. What is important? America. Freedom. Liberty. Respect. And the Ray Lewis Locker Room Reacharound . In honor of the fact that the Ravens will now ascend to their rightful place at the throne of the NFL (I don’t know how football works)…Fuck it. I’m done. I’m drunk. Coda is taking over now. The above was dictated and not read . Because some of us are a little bit wasted right now.  Coda here, I’ll be taking over now. As you may have been ab...

As you've undoubtedly gathered by this time, 2012 is an election year. And not even one of those total nonentity midterm election years.* It's a biggie. The Oval Office is up for grabs. In two days. So I've put together an extensive, if not comprehensive, post to help you navigate (and enjoy) the 2012 general elections. Be you decided in your choice or not . *Totally kidding. All elections are important. But...you know...if you have to choose...don't be apathetic now. Now Tex and I are admittedly a bit biased , but since we accept that not everyone has the same opinions we do, I'd like to direct your attention to I Side With . I Side With  lets you take a detailed political quiz and compares your stated views to those of the candidates running for President. Your results might end up surprising you ( though mine didn't ). And they might help you  undecided voters know your own minds. I Side With also allows you to compare candidates to one another and...

I don't know if you've heard, but football is back! Or, as my brother so eloquently put it: our long national nightmare is over. Which means things here in Charm City are about to get doubly exciting. Not only are the O's fighting for first place in the AL East  but the Ravens come back tomorrow to kick off another season of awesome . How best to celebrate this most wonderful time of the year? Online. Obviously. Start by refreshing your memory of all 32 NFL teams. Even if you don't need the refresher, you're sure to enjoy this rundown of Every NFL Fan in 90 Seconds . It's brilliant, funny, and spot on. I mean, I'm totally  the Ray Lewis of my lacrosse team. Then take a look at what NFL team logos would look like if they were honest . Thinking of taking in a game at a rival stadium? Don't buy your tickets blind, check out the view from almost any section in just about every stadium ever built on A View From My Seat. All photos are user ...

Well kids, the Olympics are over. And the US delegation totally kicked ass . But it's not the glory that Tex and I will miss most as our attention returns Stateside, it's the Olympians themselves. You know who I'm talking about. Our hometown hero , that beautiful fool with the terrible taste , my own coup de foudre , and Cullen Jones . One more time, now:  Cullen Jones . So in the name of international friendship, world peace , and our new hero Gabby Douglas  I'd like to present you with an Olympic-themed post just for you. But also for us. Look, this is a safe space so I think we can all just be honest with one another about something: Ryan Lochte would be a lot hotter if he weren't on Twitter . Unfortunately for his public image, he is. Fortunately for us,  The Cut has found a silver lining. Deep Thoughts from Ryan Lochte pairs admittedly hot photos of the Olympian with some of his choicest Tweets. Expect to finish the slideshow disappointed in yoursel...

Well, kids, Tex is back from her long travels , wild adventures, and mysterious rendezvous (rendevi? rendevouseses?) in the distant East. And she's brought something to share with you. You know, until recently, I wasn't big into 'furniture stores.' Why buy furniture, I asked, when fruit crates fall off the back of trucks all the time , and you hardly ever run into trouble collecting cardboard boxes ? Well, times is changed and Tex has seen the light. That light is Su Casa . As those of you who read last week already know, Coda and I entered Su Casa's Test It/Blog It/Win It contest on a tipsy   loaded   drunken completely s***faced  fun whim - never thinking we'd actually be selected to perform our jobs (blogging is a job, right ?) in exchange for goods and services, and certainly never thinking we'd actually like doing so. In fact, we showed up at the Su Casa store championship-style: a week late, a little bit drunk, and 15 minutes before clo...